Happy 2010!

The first decade of the new millenium is already finished. I remember at this time 10 years ago, we were all preparing for Y2K, backing up our computers and getting extra water and food in the house, because we were all afraid that the power would shut down and the world would end.

But it didn't. And we are here.

When I graduated my bachelor degree in 2001, I taught high school in Canada for a short time, and then decided to move to Thailand to try teaching English. I fell in love with Thailand, and instantly felt changed by the people and the culture. I went back to Canada to study my Master degree, and many of my old friends and family noticed that I was different after Thailand. After finishing my MA and moving to India for a while, I came back to Thailand almost two years ago. When I arrived back here, in a strange way, I felt like I was home again. This is a feeling that is difficult to describe. These 10 years has really been the 'decade of Thailand' for me.

When I was in Canada, I was homesick for Chiang Rai. Now I'm homesick for Vancouver. I'm always homesick for "home," wherever that is. Home is an imaginary place.

The CCC blog will take a break for a couple of weeks, and we will start again when we come back to class in the new year. For this blog, feel free to share your experiences of the last decade (2000-2010), and comment about how you have changed, or how your culture has changed, and what are your expectations for the future. I think this is an exciting time to be alive.

I wish you all a very happy new year and my best for you and your life in 2010. Aj. M

"For last year's words belong to last year's language and next year's words await another voice." T. S. Eliot

Reading the Body

When we see people, we try to "read" them. I mean, we try to understand what we are seeing. If we see someone familiar to us, we may think that they are similar to us: have a similar culture, similar beliefs, similar ways of communicating. If we see someone dissimilar to us, we will assume that they are different from us in most ways. We are always ethnocentric. We all believe that we live in the right way... why wouldn't we believe that?

But when we "read" race, we can often "read" wrong. As the world becomes more connected, and people from different places and different faces mix together, live together, and have babies together, racial stereotypes become more and more meaningless.

Race has no meaning. We are human... this is all. There is no biological difference between the people of the world.

Stereotypes do have meaning. As we now know about stereotypes, they never represent the truth of everyone in a group.

Stereotypes based on race affect our communication, and it can often be positive or negative, harmless or harmful, passive or violent. We learn these stereotypes from our culture, and we read these scripts on the body. We learn our own race by what other people "read" when they see us. This is how race and culture are linked.

What do you "read" on other people? What do other people "read" on you? When you read racial features, does it affect your communication? Or... what have other people "read" on your body? Did their stereotypes affect their communication with you? Aj. M

"Our greatest strength as a human race is our ability to acknowledge our differences, our greatest weakness is our failure to embrace them." Judith Henderson

Gender and Communication

Last Summer, Caster Semenia, an 18 year old runner from South Africa, won the gold medal at the World Championships in Germany. Actually, she didn't just win... she won easily. After the race, people started to ask questions about her. There were some drug tests, but there were no drugs in her body. However, they discovered something else. She had some male parts inside of her. Outside she is a female, but inside, she had male testicles, no uterus, and high testosterone: she is a hermaphrodite. A hermaphrodite is a person that has mixed male and female biology. It is rare, but still there are many people born like this.

Nobody knows what to do about poor Caster Semenia. She isn't cheating. Her masculine biology is too strong and fast for her to compete with women. Her feminine biology is not strong enough for her to compete with men. She is somewhere in the middle.

Gender is important for us to know before we communicate. I'm not sure why it is so important, but it is. If you're a lady, I should speak to you in a particular way. If you are a man, there is another way for me to speak to you. If you are gay/lesbian, this may affect my communication with you.

More than just gender, why do we need to know someone's private sexuality in order to communicate, or on the other hand, why is it important for other's to make public their sexuality to feel comfortable. I have had many close friends come out to me that they were gay... after that, they always said something like "they feel free." I understand why they feel like that, but I do not understand why it is important in society and culture to feel like that. Zimmerman and Geist-Martin also ask this question.

You may not be gay or lesbian or transgender or other... but maybe you have friends that are. Does it affect your communication with them? Or, did you ever feel between identities? Are you a girl that likes "boy's things," or the other way around; are you a boy that likes "girl's things?" Does it matter? These are many questions, but gender is a confusing and complicated subject.

I'm interested to know what you think. Thailand has one of the most open sexual cultures that I have ever experienced. Maybe you agree with me... maybe not. Aj. M

"My sexuality has never been a problem to me but I think has been for other people." Dusty Springfield

Don't Mention It

Can you have an argument and still be friends?

Can you break or challenge some social/cultural rules, but still keep your relationship? These are some questions that we have talked about already, and most people agreed that they could do it. When we meet another person with very different cultural syndromes and communication styles, they seem strange to us, maybe rude or annoying, or maybe shocking. I hope that the knowledge from our class will help us to understand these differences and reconcile them together.

I have a story...

There was a student from Thailand that travelled to Canada to study for a year. He lived with a Canadian homestay family. Before he left for Canada, he worked very hard to learn about Canadian culture, and about how to be polite and impress people there. He wanted to impress his homestay parents so much. He was extremely polite. He said "please" and "thank you" for everything: "Thank you for dinner; Thank you for picking me up; Thank you for everything!" And every time the Thai student said "thank you," his host parents said back: "Don't mention it."

After a while, the Thai student started to become very quiet. He sat politely for dinner, but didn't speak much. They did many activities together, but the Thai boy followed politely and quietly, but rarely spoke. The Canadian family started to worry about him. He was so outgoing and talkative when he arrived, but after a couple of weeks, something was wrong.

Finally, the host mother asked him if there was a problem. The boy was upset. He finally expressed that he wanted to impress them and that he wanted to show his gratitude, but every time he tried to say "thank you," they always told him: "Don't mention it!"

He thought that he offended them by saying "thank you," but in fact, "Don't mention it" really means: "MENTION IT." This was the first time for him to know this.

Sometimes our cultural rules and language use come into conflict. We are often trying to be polite, but we are miscommunicating because of it. This will be important to think about with the Gladwell chapter.

Please share your own thoughts or experiences. Aj. M

"We learn what we have said from those who listen to our speaking." Kenneth Patton

What is your cultural syndrome?

I went jogging on Sunday during the cool day... and I got lost... jogging and jogging and jogging... through the farms and the small villages, and I felt very Other out there in the rural roads. People laughed and yelled out at me as I ran by. Clearly I understand it, but I hate to be Other sometimes. I'm quite shy in fact, and I wish that no one would notice me. It is the reality of life in another culture.

Last week we talked about Cultural Syndromes, and this week we will look at different kinds of non-verbal communication. I think we will discover that these two ideas are closely connected.

It is important not to stereotype. We may look at Cultural Syndromes and then easily say that some cultures are passive and others are active; some cultures are instrumental and others are expressive, and so on. It is important to keep clearly in our mind that not all individuals in any culture share exactly the same syndromes.

What are your cultural syndromes? How does it affect your communication with Others? These may be difficult questions to answer, but I wonder what you think about this. Aj. M

"Our life is never individual… it is endlessly enriched by the presence of the other, and consequently impoverished by his absence. Alone, we have no name and no face, no one to call out to us and no reflection in which to recognize our features." Alberto Manguel

Friday the 13th

This past Friday was the 13th. Some students are asking about the western superstition of this as a very unlucky day. It is not exactly clear where this comes from, but there are some ideas. 13 is an unlucky number. #12 is lucky... it means "completion" or "perfection." 12 months completes a year. 4 season, each 3 months, completes the cycle. 12 zodiac symbols and so on... so 13 is the next number, breaking the perfection of 12. If you visit a hotel or high office building in the west (or even a tall hotel in Bangkok for western tourist/clients), you will see that there is no #13 button on the elevator. There is no 13th floor (10, 11, 12, 14, 15, 16...). Quite funny.

There is also the belief that bad things happen on Friday. It is the day that Jesus was crucified (killed). There are many events that seem to happen on Friday that makes people feel fear.

So, Friday the 13th is a day when people must be especially careful. I think there are many beliefs about numbers in Asian traditions also.

For my question this week:

Ascription: It is "a script" that our culture writes for us. We may feel comfortable with the script, and continue to perform it, or there may be parts of the script that we would like to adjust. I wonder about how ascription is a problem for your avowal. Or opposite: Is you avowal a problem for your ascription? Aj. M

"Culture is the widening of the mind and of the spirit." Jawaharlal Nehru

>sneeze!<... "God bless you!"

In the last blog comments, some students were wondering about when they were in America, people would say "bless you" when someone sneezed. It is a polite thing to say to someone when they have sneezed.

The belief comes from Christian belief. When you sneeze... what happens? It overwhelms your five senses: seeing, hearing, touching, smelling, tasting... When you sneeze, you close your eyes, you cannot hear anything else, you cannot smell, etc... So Christians believed that at the moment when you sneeze, your soul could escape your body (just for a moment), and it would be possible for the devil to catch it. So... people say "bless you!" to protect your soul when it escaped while you sneezed. This is where this custom comes from, but I don't think many people actually know this anymore. Now it is just a polite thing to say.

If you have other interesting stories like this to share, please do.

I have a question for the blog this week. How far does someone need to travel to be a foreigner? Do you need to travel abroad? Is it possible to be a foreigner in your own hometown?

Thanks for your comments. This is a great start! Aj. M

"Preservation of one's own culture does not require contempt or disrespect for other cultures." Cesar Chavez

Welcome to CCC, 2009-10 Edition

I am looking forward to learning with you about culture and communication. I hope that we can use this blog to share our ideas about identity and places and people... to better understand not only who we are, but also why we are who we are.

What we share here will help our conversations in class, and will allow us to continue the discussions after. If you're not comfortable to talk in class, I hope that the blog will be a good alternative for you to reveal your ideas and participate. Everyone's voice is important here.

Good luck to you in the semester. Enjoy the course. Aj. M

"A culture is made - or destroyed - by its articulate voices." Ayn Rand

Thoughts and Reflections

Thank you to all CCC students. We are in the middle of our final seminars, and I have enjoyed some very engaging topics and sometimes surprisingly energetic discussions.

This course has been a very special experience for me, and you have all been a pleasure to teach. We started the course with "Who and Why Am I" and I think that after the experience of working with you, the answer to this question becomes a little bit clearer for me. We are only possible because of the other. You have given me many new possibilities. Thank you.

If you have thoughts or reflections about the on-going seminars or the course in general, I would be interested to hear, so we can use your feedback for future generations of CCC. Aj. M

English Languages

I feel that it was an eye-opening week in CCC. I really enjoyed your comments and feedback in class. You are engaging and thought-provoking, and it has been a pleasure to discuss these international issues that complicate communication.

For example, in Thoughts and Reflections, one student wrote:

"English is known as an international language. However, I think English is just English, and I feel that the owner is the Native English speaker. I study English because I want to be able to communicate with natvie English speakers for many reasons. If every county has their mixed English such as Tinglish, Chinglish, Spanglish, etc., it will be very chaotic because if we want to use English with Chinese people, we have to learn Chinglish, not English."

This comment is very insightful and important. This comment goes to the heart of the debate of English as an International Language (EIL). Is there a universal standard? Are native speakers the authority? If every culture develops their own form of English, then what is the point of having an International Language?

Question: How can we balance this issue? How do we meet the needs for international people to communicate clearly with language, and meanwhile meet the needs for people to express their own cultural identity?

I hope this student's comments will inspire some ideas and new comments and questions to think about. Aj. M

2009

Welcome back from your break. It is hard to start again, but you have done well. Thank you for your excellent work in class on a very heavy reading week.

This week and next week, we are exploring the idea of internationalization and what that means for cross cultural communication in a post-colonial and globalized world. We are connected internationally everywhere we go and with everything we do. Every time we use our mobile phones, turn on the TV, surf the internet, and check our e-mail, we are participating in globalization. Our interconnectivity has brought many new things into our lives, and in fact made us dependent on each other more than ever in history... but what is the effect to culture?

I'm sure our world today is more and more unrecognizable to our grandparents and certainly the generation before them. Culture is accelerating. Culture is changing. Culture is internationalizing.

So, what does that mean? I would like to know your thoughts and ideas about what it means to be internationalized. What are the qualities and characteristics of an international person, or more popularly: a world citizen?

I don't know. Aj. M

"I do think this next century, hopefully, will be about a more global view. Where you don't just think, yes my country is doing well, but you think about the world at large." Bill Gates